Living Synodally: Communion Over Control in Everyday Life


People often equate freedom with autonomy—self-sufficiency, independence, the ability to decide and act on our own. But the idea of synodality dares to suggest something different: that true freedom is found in communion. Not control. Not domination. But belonging—in listening, discerning, and walking together.

This idea runs deep in the Jesuit tradition too. Discernment isn’t just a solo project—it’s communal. We listen for the Spirit together. We hold our desires and decisions up to the light, not just of God’s word, but of each other’s wisdom. It’s not easy, but it’s honest. And holy.

But what does that actually look like in real life?

Around the Dinner Table
Synodality begins at home. It’s in how we listen to our kids—or our parents—without rushing to fix, correct, or win. It’s the courage to say, “I don’t know, let’s figure it out together.” A family that practices synodality makes room for every voice, not just the loudest or most insistent.

In the Workplace
Think of meetings where people are heard, not just managed. Where decisions are discerned, not dictated. Where leaders value presence over productivity. This isn’t just soft leadership—it’s deeply strategic, because it builds trust, resilience, and creativity. But it takes time. And humility.

At a Protest
Synodality doesn’t mean we all agree—it means we stay in the conversation, even when it’s hard. It means recognizing that the Spirit can speak through anger, grief, and hope. It’s refusing to reduce others to enemies. It’s choosing solidarity over spectacle.

In a Group Chat
Yes, even there. Do we dominate the thread or do we leave space? Do we listen, or just wait to speak? Do we really want conversation, or just to assert our own ideas?

I invite you to ponder this: Maybe the most radical thing we can do today is to stay in the room—with each other, with the hard questions, with the Spirit who won’t be rushed. Synodality gives us a way forward that doesn’t require certainty, only commitment. Think of it as a daily discipline, not a lofty ideal. It’s not about being nice. It’s about being real, receptive, and responsive. One conversation at a time. Synodality as an antidote to control might just be the most subversive kind of freedom we've got!

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